Because we can't be nice all the time.

I'll keep the language simple
'Cos she wasn't awfully bright
I'm trying to find a poem,
As she goes to that "good night"

It's hard to find one written
In the canon of verse and rhyme
The words are hard to come by
I'd be better off with mime!

So where is my problem?
Why am I in a mood?
Unfortunately, it's because
She didn't do any good.

That's harsh, I know and not quite fair
She never broke the law
But she did nothing with her life
And her ceremony's a chore.

I'm trying to find the good stuff
The friends she made, and such
But these were thin upon the ground
She really didn't get out much.

"Not everyone climbs Everest"
It's a line I often say
For many the value of their lives
Lies in the everyday.

The work they do, their family life
It all adds to the mix
But this one just watched Jeremy Kyle
That's why I'm in a fix.

I'll find some point of focus
They were sad to see her go
And I mustn't impose my values
on a person I didn't know.

So back to the web and the files
As I look through the readings and rhymes
Some ceremonies write themselves
Some take a devil of a time.

So fare thee well, sweet readers
Thanks for passing by
I'll do my best for this simple maid
As her loved ones say goodbye.

RIP, Uncle

My Dad (I'm one of three girls - he's a quiet man) is a good fella. He's very helpful to his neighbours (mostly retired ladies - we call his cul-de-sac "The Harem") and is an all round good egg. He has many people that he chats to, but has only really ever had one good friend.

This friend (and his family) were like blood to us - we spent days at the seaside together, Mum and Dad went out with them for meals and we call them Aunty and Uncle.

Early this week, Uncle died. He had been poorly for some time and, when I spoke to Dad (the most pragmatic man in the world, incidentally), he said that given how ill the poor man had looked when he last saw him, then there was a great amount of relief that all suffering was over.

I moved away quite some years ago, so I haven't seen Uncle for quite a while, but I often asked after him, and wanted to go to his funeral for the reasons that we all go - to pay my respects, to support his family and to be there for my Dad.

But - and this is the lot of the funeral celebrant, sometimes - I can't, because I'm conducting a ceremony at the same time, 70 miles away.

I don't feel that there is a choice. Once that booking is taken, it's pretty much set in stone (there are rare exceptions, but as we all like to look after our families, we don't want to mess them around). Obviously, if it was an immediate close family, then I would go (and would be fit for nothing at anyone else's funeral, either), but in this case, I won't be able to.

My sister and brother in law are going to Uncle's funeral - they'll hold the family end up (ew!) and make sure that my Dad's okay.

I'll be thinking of them - sending a little warm wish across the universe. When I get back from my ceremony, I shall raise a mug of tea to Uncle and possibly shed a tear - he was a lovely man. Perhaps I'll try to go and see Aunty in a few weeks, when the busy period quietens. But that's all that I can do, right now.

No conclusion from this post, really - just wanted to send love and hugs to all funeral professionals who have found themselves in the same situation.

This is, by far, one of the best jobs, and the best industry to work in. But nothing is perfect.

Peace to all x